On his TV show, You Bet Your Life, Groucho chatted up the contestants to give them a chance to say the magic word, which would get them an extra $50. Sounds paltry right now.
Anyhow, he had on a man and a woman. He chatted with the lady for a few minutes and she did not say the magic word so he turned to the man and asked him his name.
Contestant: "Colonel Wilberforce Maccabee."
Groucho: "A kernel, eh? I thought a kernel was the inside of a nut." Audience howls.
Groucho: "So, are you married, Colonel? Do you have a family?"
Contestant: "Yes, Groucho. I have a beautiful wife and 17 beautiful children."
Groucho: "Seventeen children??? How do you account for that?"
Contestant" Well, Groucho, I love my wife."
Groucho: "Well, I love my cigar but I take it out sometimes."
The audience wept.
