| | Rectum Stretcher? |  |
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+6RAYRAY Foxfire stealth ohsresq nocerisdave Woodtick 10 posters |
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Woodtick
SSXSRider Member
Number of posts : 3254
Registration date : 2008-11-15
Age : 74
Location : Wood County West Virginia
| | Subject: Rectum Stretcher? Sat Nov 26, 2011 4:51 pm | |
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While she was "flying" down the road yesterday, a woman passed over a bridge only to find a cop with a radar gun on the other side lying in wait. The cop pulled her over, walked up to the car, with that classic patronizing smirk we all know and love, asked, "What's your hurry?"
To which she replied, "I'm late for work."
Oh yeah," said the cop, "what do you do?"
I'm a rectum stretcher," she responded.
The cop stammered, "A what? A rectum stretcher? And just what does a rectum stretcher do?"
"Well," she said, "I start by inserting one finger, then work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four, then with my whole hand in. I work from side to side until I can get both hands in, and then I slowly but surely stretch it, until it's about 6 feet wide."
"And just what the hell do you do with a 6 foot asshole? " he asked.
"You give him a radar gun and park him behind a bridge..."
Traffic Ticket - $95.00
Court Costs - $45.00
Look on the Cop's Face? PRICELESS!
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nocerisdave
SSXSRider Member
Number of posts : 5674
Registration date : 2008-01-22
Age : 59
Location : Laceys Spring AL
| | Subject: Re: Rectum Stretcher? Sat Nov 26, 2011 6:08 pm | |
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ohsresq
SSXSRider Member
Number of posts : 1753
Registration date : 2010-10-25
Age : 51
Location : Dayton,Ohio
| | Subject: Re: Rectum Stretcher? Sat Nov 26, 2011 7:46 pm | |
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stealth
SSXSRider Staff
Number of posts : 2219
Registration date : 2009-07-14
Age : 52
Location : Wise Va,
| | Subject: Re: Rectum Stretcher? Sat Nov 26, 2011 8:18 pm | |
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Foxfire
SSXSRider Member
Number of posts : 6060
Registration date : 2008-04-01
Age : 73
Location : Bristol, Wisconsin
| | Subject: Re: Rectum Stretcher? Sat Nov 26, 2011 10:03 pm | |
| Read that one to the better half, Woody......good one!! | |
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RAYRAY
Number of posts : 90
Registration date : 2011-10-15
Age : 59
Location : Statesville,nc
| | Subject: Re: Rectum Stretcher? Sun Nov 27, 2011 12:51 am | |
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bush
SSXSRider Staff
Number of posts : 6141
Registration date : 2008-06-06
Age : 40
Location : Castlewood VA
| | Subject: Re: Rectum Stretcher? Sun Nov 27, 2011 5:47 am | |
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Gimpy
SSXSRider Member
Number of posts : 7708
Registration date : 2009-10-01
Location : Louisville, KY
| | Subject: Re: Rectum Stretcher? Sun Nov 27, 2011 9:03 am | |
| County Law County Law!!!!!!!!!!!!!! | |
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nocerisdave
SSXSRider Member
Number of posts : 5674
Registration date : 2008-01-22
Age : 59
Location : Laceys Spring AL
| | Subject: Re: Rectum Stretcher? Sun Nov 27, 2011 10:23 am | |
| - bush wrote:
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 I was wondering how long that would take. | |
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mason
SSXSRider Member
Number of posts : 2247
Registration date : 2009-04-07
Age : 69
Location : austinville,va
| | Subject: Re: Rectum Stretcher? Sun Nov 27, 2011 2:17 pm | |
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Goose
SSXSRider Member
Number of posts : 2971
Registration date : 2010-03-15
Age : 75
Location : Barnesville, Ga.
| | Subject: Re: Rectum Stretcher? Sun Nov 27, 2011 2:24 pm | |
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bush
SSXSRider Staff
Number of posts : 6141
Registration date : 2008-06-06
Age : 40
Location : Castlewood VA
| | Subject: Re: Rectum Stretcher? Sun Nov 27, 2011 4:19 pm | |
| i had to show a guy last night what a 6ft+ 300lb rectum will do to ya if you refuse to cooperate and Resisting arrest.  i was called an ass many times and lots of other names. | |
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| | Subject: Re: Rectum Stretcher? | |
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| | Rectum Stretcher? | |
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