Wife Software

INSTALLING A WIFE

Dear Tech Support,

Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 5.0 to Wife 1.0 and noticed a distinct slow
down in overall system performance, particularly in the fun and sexual applications,

which operated flawlessly under Girlfriend 5.0 .

In addition, Wife 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as
B J 9.5 and Cooking 6.5, and then installed undesirable programs such as:
SPENDING 5.0,
NAGGING 3.0 and
ITCHING 9.1

SomewhatReasonable 8.0 no longer runs, and BJ 9.5 simply crashes the system.

Please note that I have tried running SmackHer 5.3 to fix these problems, but it either

makes the system have all sorts of gliches or entirely shuts down.

What can I do?

Signed,
Desperate.



DEAR DESPERATE,

First, keep in mind, Girlfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while Wife 1.0 is an operating system.

Please enter command: WhatTheHellIsyourProblem-itch.html and try to download IgnoreHerAss 6.2 and do not forget to install the Guilt-trip 9 .0 update.
If that application works as designed, Wife 1.0 should then automatically run the applications BJ 9.5 and Cooking 6.5

However, remember that overuse of the above application can cause Wife 1.0 to default to Psycho-itch9.5, < FON T color="#800000" face="Tahoma">Bankruptcy7.0

or worse yet Boyfriend 2.5
Please note that even Psycho-itch9.5 is a very bad program that will download the IWantToShootMyself Beta.

Whatever you do, DO NOT under any circumstances install ListenToYourFriendsOrSister 1.0 (it runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize control of all your system resources.)

.................

I'm gonna stay away from SmackHer 5.3 and think I'll download a copy of BreastStroke 4.7.

Some times cookdinnerforher101, and vacuumthehouseforher102 help stabilize the operating system.

Hey Yank....Claudia has asked me to tell you that you are a very "Smart" man!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Foxfire wrote:

Hey Yank....Claudia has asked me to tell you that you are a very "Smart" man!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yeah, he knows when it is time to stabilize the system!

CaptMorgansgirl wrote:

Foxfire wrote:

Hey Yank....Claudia has asked me to tell you that you are a very "Smart" man!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yeah, he knows when it is time to stabilize the system!

Tonya....Claudia thinks that maybe you and she should offer "System Stabilizing 101" class for those that might need it.

That is a good idea! Does Claudia have alot of patience? I think we would need plenty of it! Oh I forgot, of course she does, she is an RN.

Thats some funny stuff!!

DirtDawber wrote:

I'm gonna stay away from SmackHer 5.3 and think I'll download a copy of BreastStroke 4.7.

Husband 1.0

Last year a friend of mine upgraded from BoyFriend 1.0 to Husband 1.0 and found that it's a memory hog, leaving very little system resources available for other applications.

She is now noticing that Husband 1.0 is also spawning Child Processors which are further consuming valuable resources. No mention of this particular phenomena was included in the product brochure or the documentation, though other users have informed her that this is to be expected due to the nature of the application.

Not only that, Husband 1.0 installs itself such, that it is always launched at system initialization, where it can monitor all other system activity. She's finding that some applications such as SpendingSpree 2.4, GirlsNight 3.5 and CocktailNight 7.0 are no longer able to run in the system at all, crashing the system when selected (even though they always worked fine before).

During installation, Husband 1.0 provides no option as to the installation of undesired Plug-ins such as MotherInLaw 5.8 and BrotherInLaw Beta release. Also, system performance seems to diminish with each passing day.

Some features she'd like to see in the upcoming Husband 2.0 include:

1. A "Yes I'll cook, clean etc." button.
2. An install shield feature that allows Husband 2.0 be installed with the option to uninstall at anytime without the loss of cache and other system resources.

I myself decided to avoid the headache associated with Husband 1.0 by sticking with BoyFriend 2.0. Even here, however, I found many problems.

Apparently you cannot install BoyFriend 2.0 on top of BoyFriend 1.0; each program begins damaging the other. You must uninstall BoyFriend 1.0 first. Other users say this is a long standing bug that I should have known about. You'd think they would have fixed such a stupid bug by now! To make matters worse, the uninstall program for BoyFriend 1.0 doesn't work very well, leaving undesirable traces of the application in the system.

Another thing--all versions of BoyFriend 1.0 continually popup little annoying messages about the advantages of upgrading to Husband 1.0.

Bug Warning
Husband 1.0 has an undocumented bug. If you try to install Lover 1.1 before uninstalling Husband 1.0, Husband 1.0 will delete MS Clothing allowance files, before doing the uninstall himself.

More applications that won't run with Husband 1.0 include Chippendale 2.0, Netballwatching 3.5, Suremoreshoes 6.0, and Cleanup 4.3.

Applications that run very well with Husband 1.0, however, include Bummingaround 1.0, Pubnight 2.3, Golfing 2.7, Pokernight 5.3, and Wanderingeyes 4.9.

Oh boy...here we go!!

Yeah, Bummingaround 1.0 runs well even on my 486 CPU !!